![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/06/shutterstock_416344630-600x403.jpg)
Music can be a powerful component of the funeral ceremony because it allows us to process our feelings in a very special way. Grief counselor and educator Dr. Alan Wolfelt…
![People standing next to a casket, holding white flowers](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/shutterstock_2360876145-min-600x403.jpg)
The funeral is a time to truly honor and remember a loved one’s life, but how can you personalize the service to reflect that special person’s personality, preferences, interests, and…
![Woman in light blue, long-sleeved shirt siting on couch with computer in front of her, reviewing a piece of paper](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/shutterstock_1803076291-min-600x403.jpg)
Have you been asked to give a eulogy at a special person’s final tribute? While it’s an honor to be asked, it can be a little intimidating. You might be…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/shutterstock_1942330864-min-600x403.jpg)
Did you know that poetry can play an important role in the grieving process? While poetry readings are becoming less common in everyday life, they are still widely used in…
![Orange walkman with pile of cassette tapes beside it](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/shutterstock_1424968760-min-600x403.jpg)
When it comes to planning a loved one’s celebration of life or final tribute, music plays a pivotal role. It sets the tone and invites people to express their emotions…
![Microphone ready for eulogy; white and red flowers and chairs in the background](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/shutterstock_1916257307-min-600x403.jpg)
The funeral is a time to truly honor and remember a loved one’s life, but how can you personalize the service to reflect that special person’s personality, preferences, interests, and…
![Man placing a white rose on top of a gravestone](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/shutterstock_2129308964-min-600x403.jpg)
Sometimes, it’s hard to know what to think or how to process a loss that hurts so deeply it takes your breath away. That’s where traditions and rituals can help.…
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For many years, every funeral was pretty much the same – copy & paste – but times are changing! Today, most families and funeral homes are moving away from cookie-cutter…
![group of people placing white roses on a casket](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/shutterstock_2360876209-min-600x403.jpg)
A funeral is an emotional time for a lost loved one’s family and friends. If you have been invited to attend a funeral, it is helpful to know proper funeral…
![1970s music on a casette tape](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/12/shutterstock_666763003-min-600x403.jpg)
Music is powerful - it can help us express our emotions and open us up to feelings we’re avoiding. That’s why choosing the right songs for a funeral can make…
![Two women and one man standing at a graveside service, one woman holding a white handkerchief](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/shutterstock_2361639839-min-600x403.jpg)
In our culture today, there’s a tendency to do whatever is necessary to avoid pain and unpleasant feelings. This is one reason why people want to avoid the funeral –…
![Man in white shirt holding Catholic rosary beads](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/09/shutterstock_1185428665-min-600x403.jpg)
The Catholic funeral rite is a time-honored tradition that allows the Catholic community to gather in support of the bereaved and to commend dear departed loved ones into God’s loving…
![Record player](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/08/shutterstock_235188100-min-600x403.jpg)
One of the most important parts of a funeral is music. When we're grieving, music helps us express our feelings in ways that words can’t and helps us feel the…
![Older man and woman sitting on a couch, holding hands in a comforting way, focus on their hands](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/shutterstock_2221902871-min-600x403.jpg)
One of the hardest experiences of one’s life is losing a loved one. Families can experience devastation, confusion, guilt, and regret after a loved one passes. The road to healing…
![Couple holding hands at a graveyard](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/shutterstock_1236116572-600x403.jpg)
Attending a loved one’s funeral can be emotionally challenging, and you may feel grief, pain, and confusion at the ceremony. That’s where having a problem-free funeral for your loved one…
![1950s jukebox](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/shutterstock_1009992-min-600x403.jpg)
Did you know that you can use your loved one’s favorite music to personalize their funeral? Music plays an important role in a funeral by helping mourners express emotions they…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/shutterstock_179923811-min-600x403.jpg)
Music plays a vital role in a funeral service or celebration of life. Songs played at a funeral can set the tone for the service, open us up to feelings we’ve been…
![Violin laying on a wooden table](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/shutterstock_220557745-min-600x403.jpg)
"Where words fail, music speaks." - Danish author Hans Christian Andersen In our greatest times of pain and grief, we often don't have the words to describe the intense emotions…
![beautiful woman writing into her diary, in the park](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/shutterstock_663558274-600x403.jpg)
Losing a loved one can be one of the toughest trials you face in life. And maybe the last thing you want in your time of grief is to stand…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/12/shutterstock_1114940525-600x403.jpg)
Being asked to write and present someone’s eulogy is a great honor and is often reserved for those closest to the person who died. But it can also be a…
![Woman choosing a color from a color wheel](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/10/shutterstock_1842005572-min-600x403.jpg)
Creating a personalized funeral or memorial service is the first step toward finding the healing and reconciliation you need after a loss. Why? Because if the service details truly reflect…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/shutterstock_378545152-min-600x403.jpg)
Livestream funeral and memorial services are here to stay. As a society, we’ve found that livestreaming allows far away family and friends to participate in the meaningful and symbolic actions…
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Planning a funeral after a loved one dies may seem overwhelming at first, and that’s okay. So many of us have never planned a funeral before and simply don’t know…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/shutterstock_1189306000-min.jpg)
Since the beginning of time, humanity has recognized the need to observe the death of a loved one through some form of funeral. While the tradition of the funeral has changed…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/shutterstock_1584668437-min.jpg)
While the depth of feeling varies from person to person, we can all agree that when someone we love dies, we feel many different emotions, like sadness, anger, relief, regret, among…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/shutterstock_1095892961-min.jpg)
While the form and tradition of the funeral has changed from culture to culture over the ages, the fact remains that every people group finds a way to remember and honor their dead. We still have…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/shutterstock_558917821-min.jpg)
While the traditions surrounding the funeral have changed from culture to culture over the ages, the fact is that every culture finds a way to remember and honor their dead. Dr. Alan Wolfelt, a nationally recognized…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/shutterstock_114426973-min.jpg)
Since the beginning of time, human beings have participated in funerals and found a way to remember and honor their dead. While the traditions look different from culture to culture, we always find evidence that family and friends were respected…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/shutterstock_1555828892-min.jpg)
Since the beginning of time, humanity has participated in the funeral. While the way we conduct funerals has changed from culture to culture over the ages, the fact remains that…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/shutterstock_1241911273-min.jpg)
With the current guidelines on social distancing, we must find ways of honoring and memorializing a loved one other than gathering together for a funeral or memorial service. Consider these…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/shutterstock_788120020-min.jpg)
No matter how far back you look in history, you will find evidence of funeral rituals. Within us, we have an innate need to honor, respect, and remember those who…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/05/shutterstock_1161538129-min.jpg)
One way that extended family, friends, and co-workers show their love and support in times of loss is by sending flowers and condolences to the grieving family. By offering a…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/shutterstock_267900116-min.jpg)
Death and funerals are an inescapable part of life. It’s hard to know what to do when our children encounter death for the first time. As much as we would…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/shutterstock_711574540-min.jpg)
We have had funerals since the beginning of time. No matter which culture you research, you will find evidence of funeral rites and traditions. Though the specific customs may have…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/shutterstock_181222382-min.jpg)
First of all, you have our sincerest sympathies on the loss for your father. Dads are special people - irreplaceable and worth remembering. If your dad completed funeral prearrangement plans,…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/05/shutterstock_199443185-min.jpg)
First of all, you have our sincerest sympathies on the loss for your mother. Moms are special people - irreplaceable and worth remembering. If your mom completed funeral prearrangement plans,…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/shutterstock_493316527-min.jpg)
Throughout our lives, we participate in rituals. In some cases, we may not even know that we are taking part in a ritual. At weddings, we toss the bouquet. And…
![A young person cradling a red, plush heart in hands](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/shutterstock_251031811-1-min-600x403.jpg)
The Elements of a Meaningful Funeral Service “People who take the time and make the effort to create meaningful funeral arrangements when someone loved dies often end up making new…
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“A good country music song takes a page out of somebody’s life and puts music to it.” – Conway Twitty According to well-known grief expert, counselor, and author Dr. Alan…
![Group of five men and women sitting at a table, making plans](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/shutterstock_223703932.jpg)
“People who take the time and make the effort to create meaningful funeral arrangements when someone loved dies...emerge changed, more authentic and purposeful. The best funerals remind us how we…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/Feature-2-600x403.jpg)
“Show me the manner in which a nation or a community cares for its dead. I will measure exactly the sympathies of its people, their respect for the laws of…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/Top-Pic-600x403.jpg)
Readings are a great way to enrich a funeral ceremony. As Dr. Wolfelt tells us, readings are an important element of the service because they speak to “word people,” help…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/Feature-Image-Flowers-2-600x403.jpg)
Sympathy flowers are a great way to show support to a family that is grieving the loss of a loved one. As Dr. Alan Wolfelt tells us, symbols such as…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/07/Funeral-Hymns-600x403.jpg)
Music is an important element of a funeral ceremony because it helps us to process feelings that are difficult to put into words. As Dr. Alan Wolfelt tells us, music…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/FEATURE-600x403.jpg)
By Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt Paradox 3: Mourners must go backward before they can go forward. A paradox is a seemingly self-contradictory statement or situation that is in fact often…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/Feature-Image-600x403.jpg)
By Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D. Paradox 2: Mourners must make friends with the darkness before they can enter the light. A paradox is a seemingly self-contradictory statement or situation that…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/HANDS-WOLFELT-600x403.jpg)
By Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt Paradox 1: Families must say hello before they can say goodbye A paradox is a seemingly self-contradictory statement or situation that is in fact often…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_383826784.jpgActionFeatureFinal-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/ipTOzgAzmXI In this video, Dr. Wolfelt examines some of the actions that help make a ceremony more special and meaningful. Elements of action bring meaning to the people involved in…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_367603001.jpgSymbolsFeature-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/sDlrNU6rKW4 In this video, Dr. Wolfelt talks about the value of symbols during a time of loss. Symbols Convey Love When words are inadequate, we often use symbols that express…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_284602652-min-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/du6v2Y3wSkM In this video, Dr. Wolfelt discusses the purpose of readings in a funeral setting. Group readings contribute to the service in meaningful ways: Speak to “Word People” A good…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_530167714.jpgHierarchyFeature-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/efv8QYwNGiY Dr. Wolfelt has spent decades studying across cultures and age groups to discover the universal purposes that funerals serve. He has concluded that the funeral serves six functions, and…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/Grief-and-Mourning-Feature-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/1V8i2ErSfZk In this video, Dr. Wolfelt discusses the difference between grief and mourning, two terms often conflated. Grief is Internal While they are often used interchangeably, the words grief and…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_453830086.jpg^NeedsFeature-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/RLM9-v80kpA In this video, Dr. Wolfelt explains the six “yield signs,” or needs that a person has when a loved one dies. Funerals are rites of initiation that help people…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_98185655.jpgBackwardsFeature-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/6vzKpccesg8 In this video, Dr. Wolfelt provides three different lenses through which we can view the process of grief and the movement from pain to acceptance. Hello Before Goodbye Throughout…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_113984353.jpgBodyFeature-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/tHQPj-bl5AY In this video, Dr. Wolfelt discusses the importance of the body and shows how having the "guest of honor" present contributes to a healthy and healing funeral service. Acknowledging…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_310517414.jpgMusicWolfeltFeature-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/mtnumSLYzo0 In this video, Dr. Wolfelt talks about the role that music plays in allowing you to process your feelings about a loved one’s passing. The Inadequacy of Words Music…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/Eulogy-Feature.jpg2_-600x403.jpg)
https://www.youtube.com/embed/iXAL_5hOTTw In this video, Dr. Wolfelt discusses how the eulogy allow us to process grief in a healthy and meaningful way: Recalls the Life The eulogy is a period of…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/Wolfelt-Celebration-of-Life-1000p-no-crop-2-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/3G8f5lX9MFE In this video, Dr. Wolfelt discusses the important role that grief plays in the funeral ceremony. Celebrating a Life Our culture encourages us to avoid sad or painful feelings.…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_438891805-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/6Xj1aV7jJJY In this video, Dr. Wolfelt dispels the popular notion that a funeral is an opportunity for closure. A Rite of Initiation In recent years, there has been a tendency…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/Wolfelt-Procession.jpg-Feature-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/KhTSBN2Apv8?rel=0 In this video, Dr. Wolfelt discusses the important function of the funeral procession and the impact that it has on the family and the broader community. Honoring the Loved…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/shutterstock_563276542-min.jpg)
https://youtu.be/eQxJlLdld3E In this video, Dr. Wolfelt discusses the heart graphic that he created as a tool to outline the elements of the funeral. The Hierarchy To convey the value of…
![](https://www.funeralbasics.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/shutterstock_343048862-600x403.jpg)
https://youtu.be/H51f2bBLsnM Having a visitation or viewing prior to the funeral ceremony can be of great value to a bereaved family. In this video, Dr. Wolfelt shows the history of visitations…