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In this video, Dr. Wolfelt talks about the role that music plays in allowing you to process your feelings about a loved one’s passing.

The Inadequacy of Words

Music is an important part of the grieving process because it allows you to get in touch with the feelings that are so hard to put into words. After the shock of a loss, you may find it hard to process your thoughts. These profound emotions are hard to describe. Music functions as a channel between the head and the heart, allowing us to connect with our true feelings about the passing of a loved one.


The music at funeral services is often tied to specific memories of the loved one. This allows you to reflect on details from a loved one’s life, bridging the gap between past and present. In a time of grieving, it is essential that you move backward before moving forward. Music is a great way to take this positive step backward, allowing you to fully appreciate the life of your loved one and to get the most out of the ceremony.


In addition to helping you remember the life of a loved one, music also serves to strengthen your relationships with others who are grieving the loss. Music is a communal experience. It provides a way for everybody to acknowledge their grief, honor the life of the loved one, and lean on each other for support.

Ceremonial Importance

When you attend a wedding or any other rite of passage, you can be reasonably sure that there will be music. Music has become an essential component of our most important cultural ceremonies.  Adding music to the funeral provides a feeling of cultural significance. It’s a beautiful way to celebrate the life of a loved one.

Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt is an author, educator, and grief counselor with over 30 years of experience working with bereaved families. He has written many best-selling books on grief and loss, including Healing Your Grieving Heart and The Journey Through Grief. Dr. Wolfelt serves as the Director of the Center for Loss and Life Transition. Visit him online at


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