With many communities facing shelter in place restrictions and social distancing requirements due to the COVID-19 outbreak, many of us are struggling with the loss of our freedom, independence, and ability to enjoy the people and activities we love. This sense of isolation and loss of social interactions that help us feel loved and connected can bring about unexpected feelings of grief and loss. Grief is essentially the pain of separation from loved ones, and that is exactly what many of us are experiencing today.
When grief and loss are at their worst, focusing on the good things you still have can have a profound impact. Whether you are grieving the loss of connection with your loved ones, the loss of a job, or even the loss of your peace of mind and independence, focusing on what you are grateful for can help you foster resilience and adaptability as you face what life throws your way. Focusing on the good will help you persevere through the hard times and find hope for the future.
6 Ways to Shift Your Focus in Tough Times
When times are tough and your anxiety level is high, it’s easy to get stuck in a downward spiral. While it’s good to let yourself feel what you feel, remember to turn your focus to the good things in life as well. Today there may be storms and rain clouds, but tomorrow, the sun will shine again. As you face the challenges of each day, let’s talk about some good things you can focus on that will give you hope for the future.
1. Connect with the People You Love
No matter what kind of loss or crisis you are facing, there are people who love you and want to support you. Be intentional about making time to connect with family, friends, and co-workers who have a way of brightening your day and bringing a smile to your face. Even with limitations on gatherings in place, you can still reach out by text, email, and even video chat to feel connected. Don’t underestimate the power of your heartfelt words at a time like this. In time, the troubles you are facing will not be quite as difficult as they are today, and the people in your life can make all the difference in making your days the best they can be.
2. Remember the Good Times You’ve Had
Though you may be struggling right now, things haven’t always been this way. It may be difficult at first but take time each day to dwell on a time when you were happy and joyful. Perhaps it was a family vacation, a college experience, a road trip with friends, or accomplishing a long-sought-after goal. If you have some extra down time on your hands, you might want to work on a project such as a video slideshow, picture album, or photo wall that will help you dwell on the good times you’ve had. Even now, you can set your mind on a goal for the future that will give you drive and determination to move forward and figure out what life looks like beyond today’s struggles.
3. Take this as an Opportunity to Grow & Develop
Depending on your situation, you may want to take this time of transition as an opportunity to turn over a new leaf. If you’re mourning the loss of a job, you might take this time to explore an area of personal development you’ve never focused on. If you have experienced a loss of mobility or independence, look for ways to continue to express who you are and learn more about yourself. This could mean taking online classes or reading books on new topics. A perceived setback can actually be a launching pad to something new and better that you never expected.
4. Renew Your Hopes & Dreams for the Future
Despite what your feelings may tell you today, life will move forward. While things may not go back to the way things used to be, you will discover a “new normal.” But today, even in the midst of fear, sadness, or anxiety, remember that things will get better, and you will get through this. Now is a good time to consider your own hopes and dreams. Think about what you’ve always wanted to do and plan how to get it done. Looking forward to the future will give you a renewed sense of hope and a reason to keep moving forward.
5. Focus on Helping Others
When you’re experiencing grief or loss, you have a natural tendency to focus inward, dwelling on your own thoughts and feelings. Expressing what you feel is an excellent step toward healing, but you need to grieve in “doses.” In other words, you can’t do it all at once. It takes time. By helping others, you can actually give yourself a break from your problems and experience a sense of accomplishment and pride. In the midst of whatever you’re facing, taking time to care for others is an excellent way to not only make a difference in your community and the lives of others but to find continued purpose in your own life.
6. Appreciate What You Do Have
Even though you may be tempted to focus on what you don’t have, try to be intentional and focus on what you do have. That could be as simple as appreciating a lovely day or a good movie. Or, you can focus on loved ones who are close to you and give them extra doses of your time and attention. Take time every day to think about or write down a few things or people you are grateful for, and watch your attitude and appreciation for what you do still have begin to change.
These are just a few ideas for shifting your mindset so you can focus on the good things in your life when times are hard. The pain of this grief, loss, and difficulty won’t last forever. In the meantime, you can take this time to think about your goals in life, all the things you are grateful for, and where you want your life to go in the years ahead once you have come through this difficult time.