Meaningful Funerals Archives

Jun 18

Collection of printed and digital photos

How to Create a Memorial Video in 5 Easy Steps

By Kaylan Frank Educational, Meaningful Funerals, Personalization

During times of loss, finding meaningful ways to reflect on cherished memories can bring comfort to those in mourning. By scrolling through photos or watching videos, you feel just a little bit closer to that special person. As you journey through the big and small moments of their life, you uncover the truly meaningful experiences that defined them.

Memorial videos are an excellent way to capture these sweet moments and tell your loved one’s story. And if you choose to include a memorial video at the service, you can honor their legacy and invite everyone to reflect on the gratitude they feel for being so lucky to have known such an incredible person.

But how do you create a memorial video? Whether you’re preparing a tribute for a public service or collecting memories to share privately, these 5 steps will help you craft a memorial video that truly captures your loved one’s unique story.

1. Gather

Start by thinking about moments and relationships that shaped your loved one’s life, including milestones and special events. Then, begin to compile the photos and videos together. Gathering images that showcase their hobbies, personal accomplishments, or community involvement is a great way to celebrate their memory.

Also, consider inviting close family members and friends to share their images so you can create a meaningful and healing experience for everyone involved. To make collaboration easy, set up a shared digital folder where friends and family, including those who live far away, can contribute their photos and videos. Printed photos can be scanned or digitized using a scanning app before uploading them to the folder.

Alongside these images, you can also gather and combine short video clips of your loved one from various moments in their life. Also, consider including video messages from friends and family who want to share stories or memories, especially from those unable to attend. By combining digitized photos and video elements, you create a more meaningful tribute that reflects the love, memories, and connections they shared.

2. Choose a Video Tribute Program

After you’ve collected and organized your chosen photos and videos, it’s time to choose a tool to help you create the memorial video. There are plenty of accessible online programs you can use (Canva, Flixier, Adobe Express) to create a personalized tribute for your loved one. Alternatively, you can get recommendations from people you know or ask the funeral home if they can create a video for you.

As you review your program options, here are some things to keep in mind:

Choose an easy-to-use program, so you spend more time creating and less time troubleshooting.
Make sure the software fits your skill set and won’t add stress to an already stressful time.
Select a program that has an extensive royalty-free music library or allows you to easily upload your own.
Check if the software includes tools for editing any photos that may need a touch-up.
Save time by using predesigned templates with an overall theme that best fits your loved one’s personality.

If you find that you need help assembling the video, don’t be afraid to ask. Reach out to a friend or family member, or ask the funeral home if they can assist you.

3. Personalize

As you personalize the video, one of the most important things is to choose a structure that is thoughtfully arranged and tells your loved one’s story. You can organize photos chronologically, group them by themes like childhood, family, work, hobbies, or accomplishments, or even mix things up for variety.

Music or audio tracks are a great addition to further personalize a video tribute. Consider including a playlist featuring songs that capture your loved one’s unique personality or bring back special moments. Music can make us aware of our feelings, evoke memories, and bring comfort to those who are struggling.

Man walking down a street and listening to music

Some video-making software includes frames or decorative elements. Think about how these options could best serve the storytelling and structure of the video. You can also add meaningful quotes, scripture, or personal quotes or mantras to enrich the story.

Lastly, consider how you’ll pace the sections of the tribute or each image’s screentime. For images with text, you may want to display the image for at least 5-7 seconds. This timeframe allows viewers enough opportunity to read the text and briefly pause for reflection. A well-paced video keeps viewers engaged and makes each moment more meaningful.

Overall, your goal is to honor your loved one’s story and let their personality shine through. Choose images, music, and words that reflect what made them special. These personal touches will make your tribute both heartfelt and memorable.

4. Review

Once you’ve finished assembling the video, watch it all the way through and ask a trusted friend or family member to review it for any edits or improvements. Some good things to keep in mind when editing:

Check for any duplicate photos
Avoid harsh or distracting transitions
Keep the pacing in mind, giving more screen time to important moments
Test the audio levels between music and video
Check for any typos and misspellings
Make sure the text is large enough to read from a distance

Remember to make a backup copy or duplicate the file in case of unexpected technical issues. Safeguarding your work also ensures you can share and revisit these heartfelt moments with family and friends for years to come.

5. Share

When it’s time to share the video tribute, you have several options. Consider sharing it privately with your family first to allow for an intimate moment of reflection and connection. You could also choose to debut the video at the service, creating a collective experience of remembrance for everyone present.

Another option is social media, which allows you to share memorial tributes across multiple platforms, ensuring your loved one’s memory reaches a broader community.

Additionally, many funeral homes provide online obituary pages where you can upload memorial videos, photos, and heartfelt messages, offering a permanent digital space for tributes. However you decide to share, this type of tribute will honor your loved one’s memory and bring comfort to those who care about them.

Couple looking at ipad together on a couch

Hopefully these 5 steps have given you a clear understanding of how to create a meaningful and unique memorial video. The video will help you honor your loved one’s life, celebrate the moments that mattered most, and provide a heartfelt tribute that unites family and friends in remembrance. By thoughtfully gathering, weaving together, and sharing the memories that make up your loved one’s precious life, you help ensure their impact lives on in the hearts of all who knew them.

Jun 11

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Readings for a Veteran’s Funeral

By christy.kessler Explore Options, Meaningful Funerals, Veterans

When you’re personalizing a beloved veteran’s final tribute, consider using readings to bring much-deserved attention to their years of service and sacrifice. The readings you choose can complement any remarks made by service buddies, family, and friends. Similarly, you can pair the readings with meaningful music to create a truly one-of-a-kind send-off that strikes the balance between your loved one’s personal life and their time as a servicemember.

While you can use whatever readings you prefer, here are a few ideas to get you started!

Include the Service Branch’s Creed

First of all, consider including a reading of your veteran’s branch creed. In many ways, the creed encapsulates and expresses the values and principles of each branch as well as showcasing your veteran’s commitment and readiness to serve.

The Rifleman’s Creed (U.S. Marine Corps)
Sailor’s Creed (U.S. Navy)
Soldier’s Creed (U.S. Army)
Airman’s Creed (U.S. Air Force)

Read Aloud the Branch’s March Song

Another way you can personalize the readings at a veteran’s funeral is to read aloud the words of the service branch’s march song. Because march song are deeply rooted in history and tradition, they can create a sense of unity, discipline, and resilience. Reading the cherished words can be the perfect way to honor your veteran at their final send-off.

Marine’s Hymn (U.S. Marine Corps)
Anchors Aweigh (U.S. Navy)
The Army Goes Rolling Along (U.S. Army)
Wild Blue Yonder (U.S. Air Force)

Choose a Poem that Highlights the Values of Military Service

Poetry is a beautiful avenue for emotional expression, personal reflection, and human connection. Sometimes, we see our own personal thoughts and sentiments written in a way that deeply resonates. To honor your veteran, you could choose a meaningful poem (or multiple poems) that highlights their legacy of duty and honor. Here are 5 examples to get you started.

“Soldier’s Rest” (Unknown)

A soldier’s rest, beneath the sky so wide,
Their duty done, their honor as their guide.
Through fields of war, they marched with pride,
For freedom’s cause, they stood side by side.
Now in the heavens, they’ve found their peace,
Their battle scars have found release.
The bugle plays a final note,
Their legacy in every throat.

“Still A Soldier” (Timothy Emmons)

I lay here today a soldier
I know some don’t understand
I will try to explain
So maybe you can
I served my country
For many a year
I retired long ago
The soldier still here
I put on my uniform
I wore it to foreign lands
The soldier I was
Is still in the man
I have been a husband, father, and friend
To some of you here
But I’ve been a soldier all along
Even after so many a year
My final salute
I render today
I’m still a soldier
I’m just on my way.

“Eternal Guard” (Unknown)

An eternal guard in heavens so vast,
A veteran’s soul, their duty cast.
They served with valor, heart so true,
For colors red, and white, and blue.
Now angels watch where they reside,
Their courage lives, it never died.
The nation mourns, yet holds them near,
A hero’s light that knows no fear.

“We Remember Them” (Rabbis Sylvan Kamens and Jack Riemer)

At the rising of the sun and at its going down
We remember them.

At the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter
We remember them.

At the opening of the buds and in the rebirth of spring
We remember them.

At the blueness of the skies and in the warmth of summer
We remember them.

At the rustling of the leaves and in the beauty of autumn
We remember them.

At the beginning of the year and when it ends
We remember them.

As long as we live, they too will live;
for they are now a part of us

as we remember them.
When we are weary and in need of strength

We remember them.
When we are lost and sick at heart

We remember them.
When we have joy we crave to share

We remember them.
When we have decisions that are difficult to make

We remember them.
When we have achievements that are based on theirs

We remember them.
As long as we live, they too will live;

for they are now a part of us
as we remember them.

“Bury Me with Soldiers” (Rev. Charles R. Fink)

I’ve played a lot of roles in life;
I’ve met a lot of men.
I’ve done some things I’d like to think
I wouldn’t do again
And though I’m young, I’m old enough
To know someday I’ll die.
And think about what lies beyond, And
Besides whom I would lie.

Perhaps it doesn’t matter much;
Still if I had my choice,
I’d want a grave amongst soldiers when
At last death quells my voice
I’m sick of the hypocrisy
Of lectures by the wise
I’ll take the man with all his flaws
Who goes, though scared, and dies.

The troops I know were commonplace;
They didn’t want the war
They fought because their fathers and
Their father’s fathers had before.
They cursed and killed and wept –
God knows they’re easy to deride –
But bury me with men like these;
They faced the guns and died.

It’s funny when you think of it,
The way we got along.
We’d come from different worlds
To live in one, where no one belongs
I didn’t even like them all and,
I’m sure they’d all agree.
Yet, I would give my life for them,
I hope. Some would for me.

So bury me with soldiers, please
Though much maligned they be
Yes, bury me with soldiers, for
I miss their company.
We will not soon see their like again
We’ve had our fill of war.
But, bury me with men like them
Till someone else does more!

Select a Bible Verse that Focuses on Service and Sacrifice

If you are a family rooted in the Christian faith, then you might consider selecting a Bible verse that focuses on your veteran’s values. By choosing to join the Armed Forces, your veteran decided to put others’ safety above their own and serve a cause greater than themselves. There are many Bible verses that capture this attitude and could add greater depth to a loved one’s final tribute.

Here are a few to consider:

John 15:13: “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”
2 Timothy 4:7: “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.”
Joshua 1:9: “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Philippians 2:3-4: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”
Isaiah 41:10: “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Psalm 18:2: “The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.”

However, if you follow a different religion, the same principle applies. Consider reading passages from your holy book that express the values of kindness, service, and commitment to others.

Older man in uniform standing and facing an American flag

What’s Next?

Hopefully these examples have sparked some ideas in you! Or perhaps, one of them felt like the right choice to honor your veteran’s life. On the other hand, if none of them spoke to you, that’s okay. There are so many other poems, scriptures, and readings out there that can properly honor and celebrate your veteran’s life.

If you’d like some assistance, consider chatting with your trusted funeral director. They can brainstorm additional ideas for creating a personalized and meaningful final tribute that honors your veteran’s service, sacrifice, and commitment to duty and peace.

Also, read “20 Ideas for Personalizing a Veteran’s Final Tribute” for more suggestions!

May 26

Love0

Funeral Celebrants: How Can They Help Your Family?

By christy.kessler Educational, Explore Options, Meaningful Funerals, Planning Tools

When you’re planning a final tribute for a loved one, you don’t want the last words spoken over them to be hollow, empty, or insincere. Instead, the words should be real, kind, true, and an accurate reflection of who they were as a person. A funeral celebrant can help you create a beautiful send-off that feels personal, meaningful, and genuine.

But what is a funeral celebrant, and how can they help? Let’s talk about it.

What is a Funeral Celebrant?

A funeral celebrant leads and officiates a funeral or memorial service, religious or non-religious, helping create a personalized and meaningful ceremony for the person who has died. In the United States, a funeral celebrant is often not a member of the clergy, but they can be.

Their main role is to tell a story – the story of your loved one’s life. The service is about remembrance and celebration, heartache and joy. The celebrant will work closely with you to tailor the services to meet your needs and wishes, honoring your loved one’s life and personality.

They are skilled public speakers who adapt and adjust to your family’s requests. Whether it’s a solemn occasion requiring decorum and poise or a joyous celebration calling for an inspirational and cheerful tone, a funeral celebrant can strike the right balance.

A celebrant can be particularly helpful for families who are non-religious. For those who regularly attend a place of worship, a clergy member is often available to officiate the service (if you wish), but for those who are non-religious, a funeral celebrant can fill the role.

How Can a Funeral Celebrant Help You?

While the funeral director coordinates all the service details, they don’t prepare the actual program for the event or officiate. The order of events and what’s included in the service are up to the family. This is where the celebrant can step in and become a huge help.

Here are several ways that the funeral celebrant can help you before, during, and after a loved one’s service:

Learn about your loved one so they can prepare personalized remarks
Help to plan the order of service, if you wish
Suggest and coordinate readings, music, poems, or hymns
Write and deliver a personalized eulogy (based on stories you shared)
Keep you informed, so you never feel left out or overwhelmed
Ensure that the program moves smoothly from one speaker to the next
Provide logistical and emotional support throughout the planning process
Keep the event on track while staying sensitive and adapting as needed
Provide feedback to family or friends who’d like to speak at the funeral
Coordinate with the funeral home staff and other service providers as needed
Lead the ceremony with warmth, sensitivity, and kindness
Conduct the graveside service, if you wish

Planning and hosting a funeral may feel overwhelming when you’re processing and grieving a loss. The celebrant can step in and act as both storyteller and organizer, ensuring that your wishes for the service come to pass with attention to detail and authenticity.

What Should I Expect When Meeting with a Celebrant?

Once you’ve decided to use a celebrant, they will contact you for a chat, either in person or via video or phone call. If you wish to meet in person, they can come to your home or you can meet at an agreed-upon location.

When you meet the celebrant, they should put you at ease right away. They will ask questions about your loved one’s life, values, and personality because they want to understand who they were. By listening to your stories and memories, the celebrant can craft their words and presentation to reflect your loved one’s life.

If you wish, the celebrant can also discuss options for the funeral service and offer suggestions to help you personalize the service even more. Throughout it all, they will provide emotional and logistical support as you make choices that are best for your family and honor your loved one’s life.

What Questions Should I Ask the Funeral Celebrant?

While the celebrant will ask you many questions during your time together, you can also ask questions to get to know the celebrant and learn more how they work. It’s important that you work well together, and a few questions can help you determine whether your personalities and practices are compatible.

Here are a few questions you might consider asking:

How long have you been practicing as a funeral celebrant?
What is your training and experience?
Can you provide testimonials or references?
What process do you follow on the day of the funeral?
What do you do when something goes wrong at the funeral?
Do you have any specific ideas or themes in mind for the funeral service?
How will you help us create a service that reflects the personality of our loved one?
How much do you charge for your services?
Are you comfortable working with both religious and non-religious families?
Do you have experience working with families from different cultures or religions?

What’s the Difference Between a Celebrant and a Funeral Director?

While the roles overlap in some duties, they are distinct and separate.

Celebrant

A celebrant serves as a storyteller, guide, writer, speaker, and master of ceremonies. They conduct religious or non-religious services, depending on the religion’s requirements. Their main role is to lead and direct any final services and ensure everything runs smoothly while you honor and remember a loved one. They do not assist with anything related to the burial or cremation (unless they are also a trained funeral director).

Funeral Director

A funeral director is trained to support grieving families by coordinating every aspect of burial or cremation, including preparation of the body, working with the cemetery, securing permits, and filing for a death certificate. They also assist with third-party services (such as florists) and with planning final services like coordinating the viewing, funeral or memorial service, or graveside service. They do not lead or conduct the final tribute or any other remembrance events.

Do I Need a Funeral Celebrant?

You do not specifically need a celebrant, but you DO need someone to lead the service. You may ask a friend, family member, or clergy person to officiate. Celebrants are simply another option. They can be especially helpful if you don’t have a clergy person in mind or if family and friends don’t feel up to leading the service. No matter who you choose – clergy, family, friend, celebrant – always select the person who best fits your family’s needs and can meaningfully honor your loved one’s life.

How Much Do Celebrants Cost?

Celebrant fees vary, but compensation or an honorarium is expected. Ask the funeral home for a recommendation or rely on the funeral director to engage a celebrant’s services on your behalf. Once a celebrant is selected, discuss fee expectations. If the celebrant is familiar to the funeral home, the funeral director can share the celebrant’s typical rates.

Hopefully, you now have a better and deeper understanding of the funeral celebrant and the value their services can bring to you and your family. If you have more questions about celebrants or would like to meet with one locally, contact your trusted funeral home. They can point you in the right direction and help you find a celebrant who will help you honor your loved one’s life in a way that feels right and good.

Apr 07

Love0

12 Songs to Honor Dad at a Funeral Service

By christy.kessler Explore Options, Meaningful Funerals, Music

For many people, a dad is so much more than just another family member. He’s a protective guardian and a strong refuge. He offers care, provision, laughter, and crazy shenanigans. He supports, teaches, connects, and loves. When you lose someone so important to your life, the urge to honor them in a special way is strong. If you are planning a personalized final tribute for a loving father, consider including one of these 12 songs to honor his life and reflect how you feel about him.

Father holding son outside as son holds a model airplane

This list is organized into three categories: songs from a daughter, songs from a son, and songs that can be used by anyone to honor their dad. Let’s get started!

Songs from a Daughter

1. Fathers & Daughters (Michael Bolton)

When times are hard, I know you’ll be strong
I’ll be there in your heart when you’ll carry on
Like moonlight on the water, and sunlight in the sky
Fathers and daughters never say goodbye

Inspired by Michael Bolton’s relationship with his own three daughters, this heartfelt ballad captures the emotional connection between fathers and daughters. With its themes of love, protection, and hope, it highlights the way a father will be a guiding presence through every part of life, even after they’re gone. This song perfectly honors a dad whose steady support has always been a pillar of strength in your life.

2. Daddy’s Hands (Holly Dunn)

If I could do things over, I’d live my life again
And never take for granted the love in daddy’s hands

This all-time country classic celebrates fathers and their quiet strength and dedication to family. Based on Dunn’s relationship with her own father, it showcases the many hats that dads wear. From praying and calming nightmares to providing for the family and loving Mama well, this beloved melody brings tears to the eyes and fullness to the heart. Give it a listen and consider including this song in your selections to honor your father.

3. Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel) (Billy Joel)

Wherever you may go
No matter where you are
I never will be very far away

With its softness and aching tenderness, this is one of Billy Joel’s most touching songs. Inspired by his daughter, Joel incorporates themes of protection, love, comfort, and the timeless connection between father and daughter across time and distance. The lyrics touch on death and how the love between a father and his daughter will always survive, saying “you’ll always be a part of me.” For those who want to highlight the transcendence of love beyond death, this song is a perfect complement to a father’s final tribute.

4. Butterfly Kisses (Bob Carlisle)

Oh, with all that I’ve done wrong
I must have done something right
To deserve her love every morning

This Grammy Award-winning song has become meaningful to so many fathers and daughters across the nation. With its themes of growing up, letting go, and loving deeply, its message is relatable and something many fathers experience as their daughters become women. If you shared a loving connection with your dad, then this song may be a beautiful way to honor that relationship while saying goodbye.

Songs from a Son

5. My Old Man (Zac Brown Band)

I can still remember every lesson he taught me
Growing up learning how to be
Like my old man

This timeless song delves into the complexities of the father-son relationship, thoughtfully reflecting on how a son learns from his father and seeks to imitate him in so many ways. Filled with raw emotion and meaningful lyrics, the song captures the essence of paternal love and its impact on young sons. For the son who aspires to become just like his old man, this song can be a “Thank you” and a “I’ll make you proud” at a father’s final tribute.

6. Monsters (James Blunt)

No need to forgive, no need to forget
I know your mistakes and you know mine
And while you’re sleeping, I’ll try to make you proud

If you’ve never heard James Blunt’s “Monsters,” then bring out the tissues before listening. Written during a time when his father was facing imminent kidney failure, Blunt’s lyrics are real, visceral, and clearly showcase just how much his father means to him. For those with a father facing a terminal illness or who has died from a chronic disease, this poignant song can serve as a heartfelt farewell and a message of love and care.

7. Thank You for Being My Dad (Jon Barker)

Thank you for shaping my life
Thank you for teaching me all you can
You are no ordinary man, no no
You make me everything I am

A popular choice for a father’s funeral, this song expresses deep gratitude and appreciation for a father’s guidance, love, and support. With its positive and melodic tone, it is soothing even as the lyrics convey the importance of communicating the impact of a father’s love. If you didn’t get a chance to say “thank you” to your dad or want to honor him again as you say goodbye, consider adding this memorable song to the funeral program.

8. Love Without End, Amen (George Strait)

He said, “Daddies don’t just love their children
Every now and then, It’s a love without end, amen”

From award-winning country artist George Strait, this captivating and emotional song tells the story of a father’s unconditional love for his son. No matter what the child has done, his father’s love will be a “love without end, amen.” There is an unbreakable bond between father and child, and the lyrics capture the unwavering and constant nature of the love that binds. This country classic would be a beautiful addition to any dad’s final tribute.

Songs from Anyone

9. Fall on Me (Andrea Bocelli and Matteo Bocelli)

I close my eyes, and I’m seeing you everywhere
I step outside, it’s like I’m breathing you in the air
I can feel you’re there

With its soaring vocals and emotional delivery, this stunning song is a duet between father-and-son vocalists, Andrea and Matteo Bocelli. As you listen, you can hear the deep love and affection shared between the two men. While the words are referencing the ability to fall on a higher power for guidance and direction, the same lyrics easily apply to a loving father on Earth. Consider including this song as a reminder that a father’s love never ends and will continue to provide light and hope in the future.

10. Kind and Generous (Natalie Merchant)

Oh, I want to thank you for so many gifts
You gave with love and tenderness
I want to thank you

In this lovely song, Merchant shares a message of profound gratitude for the generous, selfless, and kind acts that make a significant impact on our lives. While it’s not written specifically to a father, the song’s words paint a picture of a relationship based on genuine care and support. As you say a final farewell to your dad, this song can convey the deep and abiding gratitude you feel for his place in your life and the deep love you shared.

11. Dance with My Father (Luther Vandross)

I’d play a song that would never ever end
‘Cause I’d love, love, love
To dance with my father again

Based on Vandross’s life with his father (who died when Vandross was seven), this poignant ballad leans into the importance of memory. The lyrics recall fond childhood memories and capture the essence of a loving and secure home. The yearning for one last dance, one final moment, together is something many grieving children (of any age) can relate to. With its emotional depth and powerful delivery, this song is a heartfelt tribute for any service.

12. Footprints in the Sand (Leona Lewis)

I promise you
I’m always there
When your heart is filled with sorrow and despair
And I’ll carry you

Inspired by the spiritual poem of the same name, this song emphasizes the fact that we are never alone and highlights the strength and comfort that can be found in fatherly relationships. Whether you are leaning into a heavenly Father or the memory of your earthly father, that relationship can be a steadying influence and a lifelong comfort. If your father helped carry your hurts and burdens, this song can honor that part of his life and legacy.

As you plan a personalized tribute for your dad, you are not limited to the songs on this list. These are merely a starting place and meant to inspire you. If there’s a song that always reminds you of your dad or that he sang regularly, include that song. The goal of personalizing the music at a funeral service is to capture the person’s unique life and personality. So, think of who your dad was and choose music that feels meaningful and reflects your unique relationship.

Additional Resources

For more suggestions on songs to include at a funeral service, check out the resources below:

By decade:

Feb 09

Love0

Woman in black holding red rose near her heart

Unique Venue Ideas for a Celebration of Life Service

By christy.kessler Meaningful Funerals

Losing a loved one can bring the heart and soul so much comfort to honor and remember that beloved life in a special and meaningful way. In fact, creating a personalized final tribute can make a big difference on your grief journey.

According to author, educator, and grief expert Dr. Alan Wolfelt, “People who take the time and make the effort to create meaningful funeral arrangements when someone loved dies…emerge changed, more authentic and purposeful. The best funerals remind us how we should live.” One way to personalize a funeral is to choose a venue that is unique and special to the person whose life you are honoring. But how do you get started?

Questions to Ask Yourself

The options for a special venue are numerous, but it’s helpful to ask yourself a few questions as you brainstorm.

What things or places were most important to my loved one?
What did my loved one value?
Where did my loved one enjoy spending their time?
What hobbies or interests did my loved one enjoy the most?
Is there a place that instantly comes to mind when I think about my loved one?

If your mind is drawing a blank, you can consult with a trusted funeral director or talk with family members and friends to come up with options. And to spark your creativity, here are a few ideas!

5 Venue Ideas for a Celebration of Life Service

1. Golf Course or Club

If your loved one was an active golfer, it might be meaningful to coordinate part of the service at a favorite hole on the course. After a memorial service on the green, you could move into the clubhouse. Once there, you can display your loved one’s clubs, photos, and even ask golfing buddies to share tales of their golfing adventures.

2. A Tribute at Sea

If your loved one was most at home on a boat, you could rent a vessel and have a seaworthy ceremony. While on the water, spread flowers on the water or go fishing in their honor. Alternatively, you could scatter your loved one’s ashes at sea (make sure you follow local ordinances) or purchase a biodegradable urn and lay them to rest beneath the waves. If you want, you can even turn their ashes into a barrier reef to help heal the ocean!

3. Local Baseball Diamond or Park

If your loved one was a huge fan of softball/baseball or was a player or coach, you might consider holding the service at a local park or baseball diamond. In addition to having the service, you could invite family, friends, and neighbors to play a game in your loved one’s honor. To add another special touch, you could set up a photo of your loved one in a place of honor on the field or ask everyone to wear special jerseys.

4. Nature Lover’s Outdoor Service

For outdoor lovers, you could ask your funeral director about holding the service at a local botanical garden, park, or private garden (with permission, of course). This would allow you to incorporate the peacefulness of the outdoors into your tribute and share the joy that being surrounded by nature brought to your loved one. Or, if you prefer, many National Parks allow scattering, and you can hold a quiet, private service there to honor your loved one.

5. Beachside Service

Lastly, if your loved one found joy in walking along the beach at sunset, finding unique seashells, or surfing at dawn, perhaps you could coordinate a lakeside or beachside service. You could incorporate a much-loved seashell collection or invite guests to set flowers or lanterns adrift on the water. Bring memorial candles to light as you watch the sun disappear on the horizon and remember the person you love.

These are just a few ideas for how you can personalize the venue for a final tribute. No matter what you’d like to do, bring it up with your funeral director. They will work with you to determine whether an idea is possible. From launching a loved one’s ashes into space to requesting a military funeral at a national cemetery, the funeral home staff will help you create a personalized goodbye that brings peace and comfort to your heart.

Additional Personalization Resources

For more information on how to personalize a loved one’s final goodbye, check out these additional resources that offer suggestions and ideas for a unique tribute.

Dec 30

Love0

Casket spray of white lilies resting on top of wooden casket

7 Elements of a Healing and Meaningful Funeral

By christy.kessler Meaningful Funerals, Planning Tools

“People who take the time and make the effort to create meaningful funeral arrangements when someone loved dies often end up making new arrangements in their own lives. They remember and reconnect with what is most meaningful to them in life…strengthen bonds with family members and friends. They emerge changed, more authentic and purposeful. The best funerals remind us how we should live.” – Dr. Alan Wolfelt

Casket spray of white lilies resting on top of wooden casket

In order for a funeral service to be a healing and meaningful experience, there are 7 tried and true elements that you should consider incorporating. Dr. Wolfelt, nationally respected grief counselor and educator, tells us that these 7 elements are necessary to facilitate the 6 needs that a funeral fulfills:

Acknowledging the reality of the death
Embracing the pain of the loss
Remembering the person who died
Developing a new self-identity
Searching for meaning
Receiving ongoing support from others

And what are the 7 elements? They are music, readings, a viewing/visitation or reception, a eulogy, symbols, a gathering, and actions. If you are planning a funeral, whether because someone you love has died or you are making advance funeral plans, give thoughtful consideration to how you can implement these healing and meaningful elements. Let’s look at each one in a little more detail!

1. Music

Music sets the tone of a funeral and brings emotions to the forefront. In fact, one of the purposes of a funeral is to allow mourners to grieve together, and in many ways, music says what words cannot. So, don’t be afraid to invite people to express grief. Select music that will remind mourners of the person who has died and allow everyone to pay tribute to that special person’s life and legacy in a meaningful way.

Why Include Special Music in a Funeral Ceremony?

How to Personalize Music at a Funeral

Setting the Tone for a Service: A Collection of Funeral Songs

2. Readings

Readings add another facet to a meaningful service. They are another way to not only invite mourners to express their emotions, but readings can also highlight the unique spirit of the one who has died. Did they have a favorite book? Poem? Were they a person of faith who would want passages read? Use these preferences to create a one-of-a-kind tribute.

How do Readings Enhance the Funeral Experience?

How to Personalize Readings at a Funeral

10 Literary Readings for Any Type of Funeral

Top 10 Poems for a Funeral Ceremony

3. Viewing, Visitation, and/or Reception

The viewing, visitation, or reception is a time for family, friends, coworkers, and neighbors to gather and express support and sympathy. If it is decided to have a viewing with the loved one’s body present, it provides an opportunity for mourners to see that special person one more time. No matter which type of event you choose to incorporate, you can personalize the space to tell your loved one’s story through pictures, cherished items, and more.

Viewing vs. Visitation: What’s the Difference?

How to Personalize the Visitation at a Funeral

3 Reasons to Have a Visitation

4. Eulogy

The eulogy may be the single most important aspect of a funeral service. It is the time to acknowledge and affirm the significance of the life lived. It is the moment when friends and family tell the story of a person’s life and reflect on what they love and will miss. With that in mind, share treasured memories, quotes, or even the lost loved one’s favorite jokes. The eulogy, sometimes called the “remembrance” or the “homily,” can be delivered by a clergy person, a family member, or even by a series of people.

8 Tips for Crafting a Eulogy

11 Mistakes to Avoid When Writing a Eulogy

5 Public Speaking Tips for Delivering a Eulogy

5. Symbols

Symbols offer a focus point for the bereaved as well as a sense of comfort. A few common examples are religious symbols (like a cross or Star of David), funeral flowers, and lit candles. In addition to these examples, you could also choose a symbol that is unique to the person who has died. If they were a sports fan, drape their favorite jersey over the casket or urn. For a quilter, you can display quilts, or for a veteran, you can use the American flag. Simply choose symbols that make sense for your loved one’s unique life.

The Importance of Symbols

How to Personalize Symbols at a Funeral

6. Gathering

The gathering is an opportunity for friends and family to come together after the funeral service to share stories and to support each other. During the grief journey, it’s essential to talk about your grief and share the stories on your heart. By including a gathering, you give mourners dedicated time and space to do so. The gathering can be as simple or elaborate as you wish. It’s simply about taking time to talk and to honor the life of the person you all love.

What is the Purpose of a Gathering?

How to Personalize the Gathering at a Funeral

7. Actions

And finally, actions invite mourners to put their grief into motion. What does that mean? In order to facilitate the healing process, it’s important to channel grief into healing actions. At the funeral, this could mean inviting guests to light a candle, take part in the eulogy, or lay a flower on the casket. It could also mean acting as a pallbearer, bringing a potluck dish for the reception, or sitting quietly with the casket to say final goodbyes.

How Do Actions Help Us Heal?

How to Personalize Healing Actions at a Funeral

5 Meaningful Actions to Personalize a Funeral

As you plan a loved one’s final farewell, consider using these 7 elements to create a personalized tribute. By incorporating each one, you will create a sweet, meaningful, and healing experience. Those who come to mourn will leave feeling like they have truly honored the life lived and taken the first healthy step on their grief journey.

Dec 23

Love0

Woman playing a cello, seated by man playing a violin.

12 Ways to Honor the Musician in Your Life

By Becca Corbett Meaningful Funerals, Personalization

Losing a loved one is one of the most difficult things we face in life, but designing a meaningful final goodbye can create a sweet moment of remembrance that will help soothe the pain.

Today, we’re going to talk about ways you can personalize the service to honor a loved one who deeply valued music, whether they sang, wrote songs, played an instrument, or participated in band, orchestra, musical theatre, and more. Let’s get started.

Personalized Ways to Honor the Musician in Your Life

1. Pick a music-related venue

Did you know that you have freedom when choosing the location of a loved one’s final tribute? For music lovers, your local theater, performance hall, or another type of music venue would be a great location for a service. Gathering somewhere that was either meaningful to your loved one or that highlights an area of interest is a wonderful way for people to feel closer to them.

2. Choose a music-inspired guestbook

It’s common practice to ask people to sign a guestbook when they attend the visitation or funeral service. Consider choosing one with a musical theme, such as music notes, vinyl records, or instruments. If you can personalize it, consider including a picture of your loved one playing their favorite instrument. Having a music-themed guestbook gives you a unique way to honor your loved one’s passion for music.

3. Decorate with a music theme

While flowers are commonly used for decoration at a funeral service, there are so many ways that you can get creative! To add a musical theme to the service, you could use flowers made from sheet music, play vinyl on a record player, or display posters of their favorite bands. Additionally, if they were involved in musical theatre or any organized musical group, you could add playbills, programs, ticket stubs, costumes, and other memorabilia associated with that aspect of their life. These special touches add a unique feel to the service and pay tribute to their love of music.

4. Create a collage of photos from performances

If your musician did shows, put on concerts, or played on stage, gather photos of the performances to use during the service. Put the images in a photo album, scatter them on a table, or hang them on the wall for mourners to admire as they reflect on their loved one’s life. By adding these special touches, you can bring a loved one’s past performances to life for mourners who have come to honor their legacy.

5. Display their instrument

Perhaps your loved one played an instrument, or two, or three. To honor the time and commitment your loved one put into honing their craft, consider displaying their instrument(s) during the service. The instrument will become a visual reminder of their love of music. Plus, when people see the instrument, they can reflect on the special moments when they watched your lost loved one play it.

6. Perform songs they wrote

If your musician enjoyed writing song lyrics, you may want to play their personal songs at the service. Print out the lyrics and provide them to guests as they enter the service. Have a musician, band, or family members perform the song and encourage attendees to sing along. Hearing the lyrics your loved one wrote can bring peace and comfort during difficult moments.

7. Show videos of them singing or playing instruments

Alternatively, you could include a memorial video that highlights your loved one’s musical talent. If you have videos of your musician singing or playing instruments, they could be shown on-screen while people are entering or leaving the service. Watching a video of your loved one can help you revisit joyful memories and see the happiness they felt while performing.

8. Play music by their favorite artists

Every music lover will have their favorite musical artists, and you can use those preferences to personalize the service. Did your loved one have a favorite country artist, enjoy jazz, or love a band from their youth? Use their favorite tunes to compile a list of songs to play during the service.

If you want to involve the guests, consider creating a collaborative playlist of songs. Using whatever music streaming service you prefer, share a link with mourners to allow them to add songs that you can play at the service. To ensure the songs are appropriate for the service, review the playlist ahead of time. Additionally, you will need to make sure that the funeral home you partner with for the service has an appropriate license to play copyrighted music. By inviting family and friends to create a playlist together, you give them the chance to participate and reflect on meaningful moments spent with a lost loved one.

9. Reserve seats for musical peers and students

Your musician may have spent part of their life mentoring others or leading musical groups, either as part of their career or during their personal time. If your loved one was a music teacher, voice coach, or band member, reserve a seating section for their students or fellow band members at the service. Providing special seating for guests who were important to your musician is a great way to honor their legacy.

10. Donate to a local musical organization

If your musician was active in a musical band, club, or organization, consider offering the option for people to donate to that cause as an alternative to sending flowers. Memorial contributions will serve as a meaningful way to support a cause that was close to your loved one’s heart.

11. Hand out mementos at the service

Another thoughtful way to honor the musician in your life is to pass out mementos at the service. Not only will the keepsake remind people of your loved one on the day of the service, but it will act as a reminder for years to come.

Here are a few ideas for mementos:

Sheet music of an original song or one of your loved one’s favorite tunes
Guitar picks in a basket
Picture of your loved one performing
Musical note bookmarks

By providing attendees with a meaningful keepsake, you give them a tangible object that will help them process the loss.

12. Design a custom monument

In most cases, monuments are entirely customizable, allowing you to create a unique design to honor your musician. For example, you could add a photo etching, choose the shape of a music note, or have your loved one’s favorite lyrics carved on the stone. Your funeral director or a monument specialist can help you design the perfect monument to honor your loved one. They will discuss your options and answer any questions that you may have about creating a custom monument.

These are just a few ideas to get you started! Musicians bring joy and happiness to people’s lives, and there are so many ways to highlight their musical interest and talent. By planning a personalized service that incorporates music themes, you can pay tribute to their gift, their values, and their unique personality.

Additional Resources

If you’d like more ideas on personalizing a funeral for a loved one, check out these resources:

10 Ideas for Making a Funeral More Personal
Using Color to Personalize a Service
How to Personalize Music at a Funeral
How to Personalize Readings at a Funeral
How to Personalize the Eulogy at a Funeral
How to Personalize Healing Actions at a Funeral
Why Does Funeral Personalization Matter?

Oct 22

Love1

Uniformed military personnel resting hand on flag-draped casket

20 Ideas for Personalizing a Veteran’s Final Tribute

By christy.kessler Educational, Meaningful Funerals, Personalization, Veterans

Honoring a veteran’s life and service goes beyond commemorating their time in the military; it’s about acknowledging their personal sacrifices, valor, and the unique stories that shaped their lives. From their active-duty service days to their veteran years and family memories, a veteran’s life is made up of many different facets. Today, let’s talk about 20 ideas for how you can personalize a beloved veteran’s funeral. These will help you honor and celebrate their military service in a way that is tailored to their one-of-a-kind story.

20 Ideas for Personalizing a Veteran’s Final Tribute

1. Request military honors

One of the most recognized options for honoring a veteran is military honors. This ceremonial option commonly includes the folding and presentation of the flag, playing Taps, and a salute from uniformed personnel. It may also include other elements, but the details can be worked out with a funeral director.

2. Invite guests to attend in uniform

If you expect any current or former service members to attend the final tribute, invite them to wear their uniform. This simple act will be a visual reminder to everyone that your loved one proudly served in the Armed Forces.

3. Choose a venue with significance

If you’d like, you can highlight a veteran’s service by choosing a venue with military significance. For example, have the service in an old USO building or contact the local VFW or American Legion Post to see if they can host. Or, if you choose burial at a national cemetery, you could ask for additional military honors, such as uniformed pallbearers.

4. Incorporate personal keepsakes & memorabilia

Every veteran will have special items and keepsakes associated with their time in military service. You could display awards, medals, challenge coins, patches, or ribbons in a shadow box. Create a uniform display on a table or use a dressmaker’s mannequin. Or you could put together a memory table where photos and keepsakes are shown.

5. Prepare a personalized event program

It’s common practice to create a personalized event program, where the songs, speakers, and other events are clearly outlined for attendees. For a veteran, you could use a patriotic color theme, include photos, and list their rank, awards, and deployments. For the design, you can also add insignia, logos, or the American flag or eagle.

6. Ask fellow veterans to speak during the eulogy

If your veteran was still in touch with old buddies or was involved at the local VFW or American Legion, you could ask fellow veteran friends to speak at the eulogy. With their own history in military service, they may add a unique perspective and highlight your loved one’s time in the miliary.

7. Create a video montage of the veteran’s life

While a video tribute should include every aspect of a person’s life, you can add specific details to commemorate their time in the service. Include photos of the person in uniform or volunteering with local veteran organizations. If available, you could also include video footage of graduations, promotion ceremonies, and other significant military milestones.

8. Decorate with patriotic colors or floral arrangements

Personalization has become the new norm, which means you can decorate the funeral venue with a theme, if you wish. For a veteran, you could use red, white, and blue as the signature colors during the service. Alternatively, you could invite guests to wear these colors or place patriotic floral arrangements in prominent places throughout the venue.

9. Select customized funeral merchandise

The funeral home will offer many types of merchandise, from caskets and urns to guestbooks and memorial jewelry. If you’d like, you can choose items that align with a military theme. For example, select a guestbook or an urn inscribed with the American flag or other military imagery.

10. Design a personalized monument

If you’ve decided to honor a veteran with burial or inurnment at a local cemetery, you can work with a local monument company to design a personalized grave marker. As part of the design, you could include a military medallion, a photo, or the insignia for the veteran’s service branch or unit.

11. Give guests a remembrance token or keepsake

At some funerals, guests are invited to take home a remembrance token or a keepsake. For a veteran, you could design a custom patch or challenge coin. Alternatively, you could create a bookmark with their photo in uniform or give away miniature American flags or pins. There are many options to choose from!

12. Add a timeline of the veteran’s life

Many military families move around, so it’s possible that a veteran has lived in many unique places. To highlight those cities and/or countries, you could add a timeline of the veteran’s life or display a map with pins added for each place they lived. Another option is creating collages or shadow boxes for each location with photos and mementos.

13. Encourage donations to support veteran organizations

For families who prefer not to receive flowers, you could instead encourage guests to give memorial donations to organizations that aid veterans and their families. You could look into local non-profits or direct people to national options, like Wreaths Across America or the Wounded Warrior Project.

14. Play ceremonial and patriotic music

In addition to national songs like “America the Beautiful” and the “Star-Spangled Banner,” every service branch has their own anthem, hymns, and related melodies. For example, the U.S. Navy is closely tied to the famous march “Anchors Aweigh” and the hymn “Eternal Father, Strong to Save.” With a quick online search, you can find the songs most beloved by your veteran’s service branch.

15. Sing patriotic songs together

Hearing many voices raised in song can be a powerful experience. To encourage participation and honor a veteran’s military service, you can invite guests to sing the “Star-Spangled Banner” together. Or you can select another patriotic song that may have special significance to the family or to the person who has died.

16. Arrange for a military band to perform

Another musical option is to arrange for a military band to perform during the service. You could request that they play ceremonial marches, Taps, Amazing Grace, a particular branch’s anthem, or you could leave it up to the band to choose. And if an official military band is not available, perhaps a local one would be willing to step in to perform.

17. Invite comrades-in-arms to participate

If the veteran was in touch with former comrades-in-arms, consider giving them time to share memories and express their respect. By including comrades’ stories, you not only highlight the veteran’s service, but you also create an incredibly moving moment and reinforce the power and camaraderie of bonds formed during service.

18. Read a history of the service branch

For those who are less familiar with the service branches, you could incorporate a short history of the veteran’s chosen branch. You could add the history to the printed program or include a reading on the subject. This practice could be a great way to help others appreciate the history and respect associated with the veteran’s service and dedication.

19. Include patriotic readings

Finally, you could include meaningful poems or quotes that will add an emotional and reflective element to the program. A few popular options to consider are:

“Bivouac of the Dead” by Theodore O’Hara
“The Ultimate Sacrifice” by Kelly Roper
“A Nation’s Strength” by Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Star-Spangled Banner” by Francis Scott Key

20. Customize the funeral procession

If escorting a veteran to their final resting place is planned, you could add a few unique elements to the funeral procession. Provide each car with a small American flag that will rest in a rolled-up window and wave during the drive. Add patriotic streamers to the funeral hearse or ask people to listen to a provided playlist on the drive to the cemetery.

As you can see, there are so many ways to personalize a veteran’s final tribute that pay homage to their commitment and dedication during their time of military service. And if you want to brainstorm other ideas, your funeral director can help!

Don’t Forget to Take Advantage of VA Veteran Burial Benefits

As you plan a beloved veteran’s final goodbye, don’t forget to request all the burial benefits they are eligible to receive. Depending on eligibility, the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs may provide burial allowances, a government-issued headstone or grave marker, burial in a national cemetery, and more. Talk with a funeral director or visit www.va.gov/burials-memorials to look into the details. Additionally, you can browse the resources below for more information.

Oct 03

Love0

Top 12 Country Songs for a Celebration of Life Service

By christy.kessler Meaningful Funerals, Music, Personalization

Cowboy boots with hat in foreground with guitar in background

“A good country music song takes a page out of somebody’s life and puts music to it.” – Conway Twitty

Music is a window to the soul and takes us to a place mere words never can. After all, we all know a song that particularly touched the heart and brought tears to the eyes or joy to the spirit. For countless people around the world, country music is a big part of their everyday life. For that reason, we have put together these top 12 country songs for a celebration of life. Whether you need a grief playlist or are planning a funeral and need inspiration, this list is worth checking out.

12. I Hope You Dance (Lee Ann Womack)

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
I hope you dance

Over time, this beloved tune became Lee Ann Womack’s signature song. It won the Country Music Association’s and Academy of Country Music’s awards for Song of the Year as well as a Grammy Award for Best Country Song of the Year. The song calls us to be active in the stories of our lives and to take the opportunities before us to find hope and new life.

11. Live Like You Were Dying (Tim McGraw)

I spoke sweeter and I gave forgiveness I’d been denyin’
And he said someday I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dyin’

Released in August 2004, this song went on to be the 2005 Grammy Award winner for Best Country Male Vocal Performance and the Best Country Vocal Performance. The original music video prominently featured McGraw’s relationship with his father, who had died of brain cancer. No matter whether you are grieving, planning a funeral, or both, this song is worth a listen.

10. Temporary Home (Carrie Underwood)

This was just a stop on the way to where I’m going
I’m not afraid because I know
This was my temporary home

This lovely ballad was co-written by Carrie Underwood and inspired by her belief that Earth is our temporary home. One day, heaven awaits those who truly believe in God. This song is beautiful in its melody and message. As you make musical selections for a funeral, choose songs like this that bring hope and invite others to express their grief.

9. If I Had Only Known (Reba McEntire)

So unaware I foolishly believed
That you would always be there
But then there came a day
And I turned my head and you slipped away

In this powerful song, the longing in the singer’s voice draws the listener in as Reba reflects on all the things she would have done or said if only she’d known what was coming. Even if death is not a surprise to us, we may still feel a sense of shock or disbelief when it occurs. Perhaps, we even wish we’d done some things differently. This song perfectly illustrates our natural desire to turn back time and say things unsaid or do things undone.

8. There’ll be You (Faith Hill)

In my heart
There will always be a place for you for all my life
I’ll keep a part of you with me
And everywhere I am, there you’ll be

Nominated for both an Academy Award and a Golden Globe Award for Best Original Song, this hit song dips and soars, inviting us to join in the emotional journey. Faith Hill’s melodic tones perfectly express the deep feelings of gratitude we have toward those who give us strength, steadfastness, and love throughout our lives. The words “I’ll keep a part of you with me” are perfect for those who are mourning, as we will always carry the memory of a lost loved one within us.

7. Just a Closer Walk With Thee (Patsy Cline)

When my feeble life is o’er
Time for me will be no more
Guide me gently, safely o’er
To Thy Kingdom’s shore, to Thy shore

A beloved hymn with a long history, this Patsy Cline recording of “Just a Closer Walk With Thee” is beautiful and touching. The song is a statement and a prayer. It calls the listener to trust in God during times of grief and struggle. Though we may not understand why a death has occurred, this song gives hope that God is with us. Patsy Cline’s rendition is dear to the hearts of many, and it provides an avenue for us to express our emotions.

6. Angels Among Us (Alabama)

Oh, I believe there are angels among us
Sent down to us from somewhere up above

If you are familiar with country music, you’ve likely heard of the band Alabama. They became known for their unique blend of country music and southern rock with elements of gospel and pop. To date, they are the most awarded band in country music history. This 1993 hit song is exceptionally versatile and beautifully portrays the goodness in people and how every person is an angel in disguise to someone around them. If your loved one was an angel in your life, then this soulful tune may be a fitting addition to their final goodbye.

5. Go Rest High on That Mountain (Vince Gill)

Oh, how we cried the day you left us
We gathered round your grave to grieve

Inspirational and emotional, this Grammy Award-winning song was originally written as a tribute to Vince Gill’s brother, who passed away from a heart attack. Vince Gill would later state, “All I wanted to do was grieve for him and celebrate his life.” The song talks about the pain we feel when we lose someone we love. But it also couples that pain with hope, reflecting on the joy that comes from being with God.

4. The Dance (Garth Brooks)

Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I’d have had to miss the dance

Well known in country music circles, “The Dance” is one of the most beloved country songs. The song is soft and poignant throughout, beginning with a beautiful piano introduction. The lyrics are simple but relatable, exploring the relationship between pain and risk. When we love people, we are taking a risk because one day we will lose them. But even when we lose someone we love, we’ve gained the dance of life and many beautiful memories.

3. Daddy’s Hands (Holly Dunn)

If I could do things over, I’d live my life again
and never take for granted the love in daddy’s hands

Written as a Father’s Day gift, “Daddy’s Hands” became Holly Dunn’s breakout song and signature hit. The lyrics are sweet and simple, beautifully portraying the love between a father and his child. With its open lyrics, either a son or daughter could use the song as the perfect tribute. If you are looking to highlight a father’s loving relationship with his children, then this melody may be the perfect fit for the service.

2. One More Day (Diamond Rio)

I didn’t ask for money
Or a mansion in Malibu
I simply asked for one more day with you

Following several tragic events that occurred in 2001 – namely 9/11, the Oklahoma State plane crash, and the death of Dale Earnhardt – “One More Day” became a song of mourning and healing. Diamond Rio drummer Brian Prout said the song was very special. He knew that the song had an “impact on someone’s life and helped in a tough time of healing and hope.” The desire for more time with our lost loved ones is universal. This song helps us touch on those emotions and express them in a healthy way.

1. When I Get Where I’m Going (Brad Paisley, featuring Dolly Parton)

But when I get where I’m going
And I see my maker’s face
I’ll stand forever in the light
Of his amazing grace

Featuring the vocal harmony of Dolly Parton, this inspirational song carries a two-fold focus. In part, the lyrics paint a picture of wonder and joy awaiting those who have left this earth and an exhortation to those still alive that they should rejoice that their loved one is in heaven. But on the other hand, the song acknowledges the pain of missing those we love deeply. Bittersweet and beautiful, this song is well worth considering for a meaningful celebration of life.

More Musical Selections to Consider

If you are interested in learning more about meaningful music, check out the articles below.

Setting the Tone for a Service: A Collection of Funeral Songs
How to Personalize Music at a Funeral
Why Include Special Music in a Funeral Ceremony?

Nov 25

Love0

Man and woman in black clothing leaning on each other in a comforting way as they attend a visitation

Viewing vs. Visitation: What’s the Difference?

By christy.kessler Explore Options, Meaningful Funerals, Planning Tools

After losing a loved one, you will have to make many decisions regarding what type of services will best honor their unique life. As you speak with a funeral director, they may ask you, “Would you like to have a viewing or a visitation?” These two terms may seem interchangeable, but they actually aren’t. Let’s talk about the key difference between them.

What is a Viewing?

For some people, it’s important to physically see a loved one before they are laid to rest. At a viewing, the deceased’s body is available to “view,” often lying in a casket with flowers or memorabilia nearby. You can choose to have a public viewing or a private, family-only viewing.

The act of viewing the person can play an important role in the grieving process. It’s an opportunity to say goodbye in person, to touch that special person one final time, to kiss their forehead in farewell. It’s also an opportunity to truly acknowledge the reality of the death. Sometimes, the truth of a loved one’s death doesn’t feel real at first, but by seeing their body for yourself, the reality of the death begins to sink in. And as hard as it may be, accepting the reality of the death is an important aspect of the healing process.

Additionally, the viewing may also provide an opportunity to pay respects to the surviving family. It’s not required that the family be present at the viewing, but most of the time, they are. The viewing gives mourners access to the grieving family and the chance to offer condolences and support following the death.

What is a Visitation?

On the other hand, a visitation is a little different. The surviving family must be present, but the deceased’s body is not visible. While there may be photos, an urn, or even a closed casket, there is no viewing of the body itself.

Instead, the focus of the visitation is on paying one’s respects by offering support and condolences to the grieving family. It’s a time for surviving family members to make themselves available to friends, family, co-workers, and neighbors who want to offer their sympathies. It’s also a time to share stories about the deceased and comfort each other through shared grief.

Because the funeral service itself has an order of events, it’s not always the best time to offer support and condolences. The visitation is more casual and provides the chance to speak freely and as long as you want without the time constraints of the funeral service.

Are there Any Similarities?

Absolutely! Here are a few ways in which the viewing and visitation are similar to each other:

They may both include an opportunity to pay respects to surviving family members
Each event may be personalized to reflect the life of the person who has died
There may be refreshments or a meal provided, if the family wishes
The event can take place at the funeral home, church, community hall, or even a residence (depending on local regulations)
It doesn’t matter whether you choose burial or cremation, you can still have a viewing or visitation (though embalming is generally recommended for the viewing)

Could I Have a Viewing AND a Visitation?

Yes, you could, but to keep things less stressful for the grieving family, it’s often recommended to simply have a viewing with the family also present. By doing so, you cut down on the number of events the family must attend while still achieving the benefits of both a viewing and a visitation.

Is a Visitation or Viewing Required?

Neither of these events are required. It’s entirely up to your personal preferences whether you’d like to include either one. They do have their benefits, so speak with your family and the funeral director as you decide whether to include them or exclude them from a loved one’s final tribute.

Are There Times When a Viewing is Not Recommended?

Yes, there are times when the funeral director may recommend that the family skip the viewing. Most of the time, this recommendation is made because the body is not as presentable. While funeral homes can do wonders with cosmetics or restorative arts, there are times when it’s not enough to restore a loved one’s appearance to how you remember them. In these cases, the funeral director will use their professional judgment and suggest you skip the viewing. The final decision will be up to the surviving family members.

When Does a Viewing or Visitation Occur?

As you plan the funeral service with your chosen funeral director, you can discuss the options. The two most common choices are:

Have the visitation/viewing the evening before the funeral service. This allows anyone unable to attend the funeral service a secondary opportunity to say goodbye and offer their support.
Have the visitation/viewing the hour prior to the funeral service. This option means that the grieving family only has one event to attend, but there may be some people unable to attend due to their own work or personal schedules.

Ultimately, it’s up to the family to decide what’s best for their own grief and for honoring their loved one’s life.

Personalization is Key

Now that you have a better understanding about the key differences between a viewing and a visitation, it’s essential to discuss the importance of personalization. For an event to be meaningful, it must also be personalized. You can go simple or elaborate, but the personal touches will make the viewing or visitation that much more special to the grieving family and any other mourners.

Here are a few resources that will help you personalize the event, whether you choose a viewing or a visitation: