Acknowledging our own mortality can feel uncomfortable, but deep down, we all want to be remembered after we’re gone – not just for the things we accomplished, but for who we are. Every person’s life tells a unique story, a treasure trove of wisdom, love, and experiences worth sharing. Unfortunately, too many of our loved ones’ stories go untold, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Legacy projects offer a meaningful way to share your story and support your family through the grief that comes after losing a loved one.
What are Legacy Projects, and Why are They Important?
Legacies come in many forms. Some are tangible, such as heirlooms or lasting contributions, while others are intangible, including the values we pass on and the memories we leave behind. Legacy projects help preserve your values, knowledge, and contributions in a meaningful way. They also allow you to weave your story with intention, building a bridge between your past and your family’s future.
But how do legacy projects benefit both you and your family? Legacy projects can create a map of meaningful moments that benefit both you and your loved ones on the journey through grief.
- For you: This kind of project encourages reflection, providing emotional clarity while also giving you a way to pass down valuable insight, skills, and traditions. It could become a legacy that future generations continue, honoring your memory and the impact you’ve made.
- For your family: Cherished keepsakes can serve as a physical reminder of you, providing comfort after you’ve passed. A project built around your story can bring people together and create a new tradition of sharing your life with those yet to come.
Additionally, Dr. Alan Wolfelt, a nationally respected grief counselor and author with decades of experience helping the grieving, talks about how going backward through memories can bring comfort: “In my experience, remembering the past is the very thing that eventually makes hoping for the future possible. Mourners’ lives will open to renewed hope, love and joy only to the extent that they first embrace the past.” By helping your loved ones embrace the past, you help them process their grief and move forward to the good the future holds.
How to Choose a Legacy Project
When you set out to create a legacy project, knowing where to begin can be a challenge. Here are three thoughtful questions to consider if you’re ready to get started! These questions are designed to help you tune in, connect with your passions, and start shaping a project that truly reflects who you are.
How do you want to be remembered?
Take time to reflect on what is most important to you – your values, impact, and the legacy you hope to leave behind. Set aside time each week for quiet reflection. Keep a journal or notepad nearby to jot down your thoughts as they arise. Additionally, looking back at photographs, journals, or cherished memories can help guide you towards what project you want to create.
What has been meaningful about your relationships?
If you and a loved one shared an interest, then you might consider a legacy project around that shared topic. For example, if you and your daughter love going to see plays at the theater, you could create a scrapbook with photos, playbills, and ticket stubs. After gifting the project to your daughter, it will become a gentle invitation to revisit memories of you. Do you have a Sunday breakfast tradition with your grandchildren? You could create a Family Breakfast Cookbook and fill it with handwritten recipes, along with notes about the memories tied to each one. Like when your grandson flipped the pancakes too early, or the eggs you scrambled perfectly together. Think through your relationships and consider who might benefit from a legacy project based around a shared interest.
Do you have any hobbies that bring you joy or help you unwind?
Think about activities that are meaningful to you. Whether it’s knitting, baking, collecting, writing, painting, reading, or traveling, you can use your talents to create a legacy project that truly reflects who you are. Do you have a favorite spot at the park, a timeless handmade quilt, or an assortment of vintage cameras that you once used to document your travels? Whatever you choose, you can turn what you love into a lasting legacy.
If you get stuck, ask your family members or close friends for brainstorming help or reach out to those who may want to be involved in preserving your legacy after you’ve passed.
More Ways to Share Your Story
Even with the questions above to help, you may still feel unsure about where to begin. Here are some more suggestions to ignite your own imagination and get your ideas off the ground!
For the writers:
Journals or letters filled with words of wisdom are a powerful way to pass down values and life lessons to your loved ones when advice and encouragement are needed. You can even write letters for memorable milestones like graduations, weddings, and other life events.
For the sentimental:
Photos and photo albums, both physical and digital, can serve as visual stories to spark conversations. Memory capsules are another way to pass sentimental items on to your loved ones to help them heal.
For the foodies:
Do you have a secret recipe, or is there a dish you make that everyone loves? Creating a recipe book or curating a box of favorite recipes is a meaningful way to pass your legacy down through the memories tied to smell and taste.
For the tech-savvy:
Digital videos and voice recordings are an excellent way for your loved ones to revisit time spent with you. This type of project will help preserve your laughter and presence in a form that can be replayed, bringing comfort and maybe even joy in grief.
For the adventurers:
Talk with your loved ones about meaningful memorials. Have you thought about a bench in your favorite park or a plaque at your most visited ballfield? Additionally, if you’re considering cremation, you might ask your family to scatter your remains in a place that holds special meaning.
For the collectors:
Your treasured collections, such as cameras, art, model trains, or sports memorabilia, carry stories and significance. Passing them on as meaningful gifts ensures that your interests continue to inspire.
For the creatives:
Do you have a portfolio or print pieces that include photography or paintings you’ve created? Have you written poetry or music that you would like to be kept in the family? These items can offer comfort and connection, helping your loved ones feel close to you through art or music.
For the readers:
Some books have been in the family for generations as cherished heirlooms. For example, a father or grandfather might read a story every holiday season, and family members may want to carry on the tradition! If your collection holds sentimental or historical value, consider how you’d like it to be preserved.
For the philanthropists:
Do you have a favorite nonprofit organization that you regularly donate to? Would you like for someone in your family to continue supporting a cause in your name? Discuss the possibility of donating to a foundation of your choice with your loved ones.
For the old souls:
Does your family have a special tradition or any beloved items that have been passed down through generations? Family Bibles, antique furniture, jewelry, and quilts can be wonderful items to pass down through the family tree.
Start Telling your Story Today!
Hopefully your creativity is sparking, and you’ve come up with an idea for a legacy project (or even several!). While it may be uncomfortable to think about the end of your life, there’s comfort and healing in telling your story.
A gentle exploration of how you want to be remembered can be a powerful and grounding experience. Completing a legacy project and gifting it to someone you love creates an emotional impact that lasts. For years to come, they’ll have something that’s tangible and meaningful to help them connect back to you. How would you like your story to be told?
