When grief comes, it touches every member of the family, children included. And in some ways, children may have a harder time because they haven’t yet learned how to identify their emotions accurately. That’s why they need caring adults around to help them grieve and work through their emotions. If there’s a grieving child in your life this fall, consider using these remembrance crafts to help them talk through their feelings.
1. Memory Box
First, you might consider putting together a memory box. The child can interact with the items regularly and keep the person’s memory alive. You could include clothing, jewelry, photos, or cherished items like a favorite trinket or even a blanket or stuffed animal.
Also, ask the child if there’s anything they’d like to include in the box. They may associate special memories with a certain item that will bring them comfort in the days ahead. And if you’d like to add a creative element, decorate the outside of the box with fall leaves, pumpkins, or other décor that adds a personal touch.
2. Memory Mailbox
With this craft, you create an opportunity for a grieving child to share feelings, ask questions, and write down memories. Get a cardboard box, cereal box, or some other box-type item and decorate the outside. You can use a fall theme (like this turkey box), or you can decorate however you choose.
Once the box is ready, encourage the child to write down questions or their feelings on pieces of paper. It could be as simple as “I miss Gigi” or “Where did Mommy go?” They could also write down their favorite memories or draw pictures. Then, as new pieces of paper are added to the mailbox, choose a time to talk together about these feelings and questions. This practice will give you an opportunity to talk, hear your child’s concerns, and care for their emotions. You could chat every day or once a week – whatever works best for your family.
3. Gratitude Pumpkin
While it may be difficult at first, focusing on gratitude after a loss can help you grieve. The practice of gratitude takes your eyes off the pain and helps you see the good in life. To help a child build resilience after loss, help them look for the good with a gratitude pumpkin.
Either cut out a large pumpkin or many small pumpkins. Then, encourage the child to write down things they are grateful for or miss about the person who has died directly on the pumpkin. If you make many small pumpkins, your child could write a single thought on each one. On the other hand, if you opt for a large pumpkin, they can write many different ideas on it. Either option will work well; simply choose the one you prefer. This intentional gratitude activity will help the child process what they’re feeling while also learning coping tips for how to deal with grief in the future.
4. The Grieving Tree
With this meaningful activity, your child can identify the things they have lost when a loved one died and the things that are still growing. On each leaf-laden branch of the grieving tree, you write seven things that are still growing despite the loved one’s passing. For example, “I trust in your love for me.” And on the ground next to the tree, list five things that have been lost, such as “hugging you” or “singing together.”
With this practice, both you and your child can sit in the loss for a time. While it’s hard to simply be still in the pain, it’s necessary for the healing process. By naming what is still growing and what is lost, you can take thoughts or feelings that seem ever-present and put them into words. For a full list of materials you’ll need, click here.
5. Bracelet or Necklace
Kids often love to create bracelets or necklaces with multi-colored beads. Take that natural interest and turn it into a remembrance craft.
The first step is to get string (or elastic) and a lot of beads. You could get many different colors, sparkling or matte, standard circular or specific shapes like pumpkins, flowers, or hearts. Also, get beads with letters on them. That way, when the grieving child creates the piece of jewelry, they can include the lost loved one’s name or a special message.
Once it’s complete, let the child wear the jewelry as often as they want. Some children may choose to wear it often, while others may place the bracelet/necklace on a favorite stuffed animal or even put it in a memory box.
6. Pumpkin Stress Ball
Some kids are more prone to stress and anxiety than others, especially following a significant loss. They may feel like their ordered world is turned upside down or afraid that something may happen to the other people in their life.
If you have a stressed child in your home, consider creating a pumpkin stress ball. Get some orange balloons and fill them with rice. Once you tie off the balloon, use a black Sharpie to draw silly Jack O’Lantern faces on it. Then, when the child is feeling stressed or anxious, they can give the balloon a squeeze.
7. Photo Frame
Another craft you can introduce is decorating a photo frame. Buy an unadorned frame, pull out the glue gun, and sit down with the grieving child to create a lovely home for a favorite photo. You could use artificial flowers or leaves, buttons, beads, or whatever you want. Depending on the child’s age, it might be best for the adult to handle the glue gun, but under the child’s creative direction, of course.
Once the frame is complete, add a photo and place the frame in a place where the child can see and interact with it regularly. The creative action of decorating the frame is healing but having the photo nearby will keep the process going.
8. Drawing
Perhaps the simplest craft is to allow kids to draw whatever is on their minds. All you have to do is provide all the appropriate materials: construction paper, white paper, pens, pencils, markers, etc. Then, give the grieving child a prompt, like “Let’s draw a picture of your favorite thing about Grandpa.” After that, the child’s creativity will take over.
You can join the child and make your own picture, talking together and each sharing special memories. Speaking about the person who has died will help the child understand that it’s okay to talk about the person (it’s not taboo), and it will give you an opportunity to share your own memories and grief. Children learn by example, so seeing you talk about your feelings will teach them to talk about theirs.
9. Flower Bouquet
Another craft to consider is creating a flower bouquet. You can go to the store to purchase artificial flowers and then work with the child to create a unique arrangement. Once the bouquet is complete, go to the graveside together and leave the flowers at your loved one’s final resting place.
Also, you can create a floral arrangement for every season. For fall, you might choose to focus on poinsettias, black-eyed susans, or other flowers that are in shades of yellow, orange, or cream that align with the season. You can even add a few tiny pumpkins or Halloween embellishments. Let the grieving child use their imagination to create something beautiful.
10. Journal
And lastly, for some children, expression through words is powerful. By creating a journal, you can bring together two kinds of creative expression: art and words. Encourage the child to write or draw in it as often they want. And if they need a new journal at some point, you can make another one together.
You can make this craft as simple or complex as you wish. For something simple, pull out two sturdy pieces of paper (construction paper or cardstock possibly) to act as the front and back cover. You could use orange paper for a fall twist! Ask the child to decorate both pages with pens, markers, paints – whatever they want. Then, get a stack of wide-ruled paper to act as the interior pages. Staple is all together, and voila! You have a homemade journal.
Many of these crafts can be used any time of year, but with a few tiny adjustments, you can tailor them to fit the season you’re in. With fall, steer toward yellows and oranges or pumpkins and corn. But no matter when you choose to implement these craft ideas, they can be an outlet that brings hope, healing, and remembrance.
